My friend was dating a guy for only about 3 months. He lived out of town, so was in the state maybe 2 weeks for each of those months. I don't know how
"deep" their relationship was because in that time she never talked about him to me, except mentioning he was in town and could no longer do anything
with me the entire time he was there. I also only met him on the night she met him, which happened to be my birthday and she was making out with him when I
came back from the bathroom. I found that odd that she never wanted us all to hang out, cuz you want your boyfriend to meet your best friend, right? So
needless to say I know relatively nothing about him or their relationship.
He broke up with her last week. She has been crying and so depressed she couldn't eat until like Friday. Like, my life if ended crying. She took off
days from work. I've been trying to get her to go out and do stuff to get her mind off it---shopping, movies, concerts, ect. Then last night she was
crying in the back on my car on the way to a concert.
I don't know what to say. I can't be supportive cuz I wanna say "suck it up!" but she'd flip out. It probably doesn't help that I
didn't think dating a guy who travels as much as he does was a good idea. Am I being a horrible friend for not being supportive?
Is she over reacting?
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 MommaTLake |
Is she over reacting? |
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Posts: 1717 (10/04/2009 9:05 PM) |
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GCisPC |
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Posts: 2146 (10/04/2009 9:07 PM) |
Like you said, you don't know how "deep" their relationship was. So no she's not over reacting. Be a friend and be there for her, you'd
want her to be there for you.
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OhGetOverIt |
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Posts: 2474 (10/04/2009 9:09 PM) |
You honestly just have to give her space. Everyone recovers from situations like that differently. She obviously really liked him, had feelings for him beyond
the obvious suckface sessions and he hit the high road. You don't really need to do much more than what you already have done. She'll recover
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MommaTLake |
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Posts: 1718 (10/04/2009 9:16 PM) |
I know she's gunna need time. She's done this with a few of her previous boyfriends, but those were like 9 months. That I could see.
She's also told me in the past, "I just don't wanna start all over again." |
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 Mistress Darcy |
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Posts: 11646 (10/04/2009 9:19 PM) |
I generally think girls are being silly when they throw hysterics and take off work when a guy breaks up with them.
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OhGetOverIt |
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Posts: 2476 (10/04/2009 9:20 PM) |
I know, its annoying as fuck when friends go through breakups no matter the extreme (or lack thereof) because they are about as exciting as a stick in shit.
Hang with your other friends and let her come out of it on her own. Shes gotta get a grip eventually. Hey if she lives in NH I have a guy friend who has an
imaginary girlfriend! Maybe they can pair up and be a real item
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AudaciousAudrey |
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Posts: 31494 (10/04/2009 9:21 PM) Biggest Know It All '09
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Yes, but most girls do.
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xBecky |
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Posts: 13051 (10/04/2009 10:04 PM) |
hi Jenna.
I feel like a creeper. But, I agree to just give her time.. and throw in inconspicuous advice when you're able to. Maybe something will stick. |
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MommaTLake |
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Posts: 1720 (10/04/2009 10:17 PM) |
Hey Becky! Thanks for the advice.
I hate to sound like I don't care, cuz I do. It's just not the end of the world, which she thinks it is. And how can she ever be happy again without a boyfriend? Thanks pal, I'm glad my presence isn't enough to make life worth living. |
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xBecky |
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Posts: 13056 (10/04/2009 10:20 PM) |
"And how can she ever be happy again without a boyfriend? Thanks pal, I'm glad my presence isn't enough to make life worth living. "
that shouldn't make me laugh, but it did! you're a good friend, so I'm sure if you keep up the positivity she'll see the light hopefully soon. |
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idontknowwhat |
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Posts: 8136 (10/04/2009 10:22 PM) |
um, how does one get an imaginary girlfriend?
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MommaTLake |
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Posts: 1721 (10/04/2009 10:28 PM) |
idontknowwhat wrote: quite easily, I assume 
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pinkberry |
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Posts: 5935 (10/04/2009 10:31 PM) |
Ugh, that's so annoying. I seriously can't stand when girls act like that. A few of my friends act like that all the time and it's always with the
same losers who "break their heart" over and over and over again.
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MommaTLake |
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Posts: 1722 (10/04/2009 10:37 PM) |
Oh! Now I guess he texted her that he'd be in town next week, and I quote, "Not that you'd care." So now she's asking, "Why
would he do that?" And I just flat out told her he's just lookin for you to bow down to him and do what he wants. He just needs someone to be with
while he's in town. This should have been her sign that he's not worth it. I really, really, really hope she doesn't see him.
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OhGetOverIt |
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Posts: 2477 (10/04/2009 11:01 PM) |
Of course she's going to see him. We already know this will happen
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MommaTLake |
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Posts: 1723 (10/04/2009 11:10 PM) |
I'm sure she will. But then, it'll be her own fault and I can be "I told you so." But I won't actually say it. I've found all I can do it nod. Because she doesn't want to talk about it anymore which means no one else is allowed to talk about him, especially if we say get over it. |
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August86 |
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Posts: 5999 (10/04/2009 11:17 PM) |
Mistress Darcy wrote:I wasn't aware girls did this. My best friend is overly dramatic when it comes to her relationships, but she's never called off work over a break up. |
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pinkberry |
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Posts: 5937 (10/04/2009 11:36 PM) |
Oh yes, I've had friends call out of work over a break up. I've even had a few start going to therapy
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